Prince Charming + Tito’s

Happy Tuesday y’all!

So, let’s talk Mother’s Day mamas. . . And, let’s be really, really real.

My Mother’s Day definitely did not play out as I had expected.  Did yours?

Throughout all of the years of waiting. . . Waiting for my husband to get home after the end of a long week of traveling, waiting for him to come home after months of training, I have found that the hardest part of the waiting game comes just days before their arrival.  The excitement, the expectations. . . They all start to build up.

Just a lil’ background info for y’all: My husband was on a weekend flight this past weekend, and so Brooklyn Meadow, Lemon, and myself enjoyed a girl’s weekend in.  Filled with pizza dates and tiny adventures, we had greatly anticipated the return of our knight in shining armor.

My mind had switched over to fantasy mode, and I began to enter a dream-like state.  In my head, I had dreamt up the perfect outfit, the perfect hello, the perfect kiss.  In my head, I could see him running to me and engulfing me in a full embrace.  I pictured him holding me tight, never wanting to let go.  A day filled with sharing stories and stealing kisses.  Can y’all tell I am a dreamer or what?

So, on Sunday when I had received the “OK” to leave for the airport, my mind went into overdrive.  My handsome husband in his flight suit was going to walk off the runway, run to me and hold his girls tightly.  We were going to spend the afternoon brunchin’, drinking mimosas on the patio overlooking cornfields.  We would spend the rest of the evening as a family, on a walk, relaxing, appreciating one another.

SCREEEEEEEEECH.

“Hey babe?  Can we go home so that I can change out of my flight suit?” *Cue Brooklyn Meadow crying, crankily anticipating a nap in the backseat*

My fairytale began to unravel as we got closer and closer to home.

I was discouraged, disappointed, upset.

Needless to say, after getting home, we spent the remainder of the day inside quietly, as my husband napped.

Was I mad as hell?  Yes.  At him.  At the situation.  The day.  Myself.  Yes.

And here is why I love writing so dang much.  Because writing has and had allowed me to reflect on the situation.  It allows (and had allowed) me to see my written perspective against a blank, unbiased canvas.  Without my mind interrupting, I can (and did) truly mediate and reflect on my situation.

My husband didn’t “ruin” my Mother’s Day.  I didn’t ruin it.  No one ruined it.  It just didn’t turn out as I had expected.

I, simply, in the midst of dreaming, had lost sight of my reality.

In my dream-like state, I failed to factor in that my husband worked hard and long hours all weekend.  He was physically and mentally exhausted.  He had an early morning and a set of flights to prepare for the next day.  I, on the other hand, was running on very little sleep and as a result was irritable and on edge.

Often, we brew expectations in our mind automatically and subconsciously.  We simply cannot help it.

In the end gals, we should never release ourself from knowing our self-worth and carrying forth what we know and believe we deserve.  And although our expectations form suddenly and without warning, we must learn to separate our fairytale expectations from reality.  Hold up – I am not saying stop dreaming!  No, no, no.  We must just be mindful.  At the end of the day, life is going to pan out the way it is supposed to pan out ♡

Ultimately y’all, God’s (the Universe’s, whomever or whatever you believe in’s) expectations for our life are sometimes different than our expectations for our life.

So, just ride the wave.  Be thankful.  Practice gratitude.  Give yourself a little grace.  It is okay that you aren’t always super mindful of your blessings in the heat of the moment.  Forgive yourself.  Allow yourself to grow from it. #glowup

And sometimes, you just need to sit back, relax, have a little Tito’s and let life happen.

Much love –

Devotional, What?

Good afternoon y’all!

Happy Wednesday

The following is not solely based upon writing devotionals.  Rather, it is in essence, a piece on pursuing each and every dream that you ever had or ever will dream.

Each night, while rocking my daughter to sleep, I typically brainstorm what exactly I am going to center my thoughts on + write on the following day. Most days, the “night before’s thoughts” take a back seat, are placed on my “Journaling Inspo'” list, and are saved for a rainy day. I cannot help but feel completely and totally inspired with each new day. Call me crazy!

But last night, as I rocked my daughter to sleep (we were going on 40-minutes at this point, sleep nowhere near on the horizon), I began to think more on devotionals. Specially, on how to write one. For those of y’all who do not know, a devotional is typically religious in nature, often used in religious worship, providing a specific reading for each day (Merriam-Webster, 2019).

The light bulb then flashed, each night, rather than spending time entirely brainstorming, why not write a short, meaningful and from-the-heart devotional, for any and all to read before shutting their eyes at night. For mama’s to read while rocking their little one’s to bed. For those, up in the middle of the night, trying so desperately to fall back asleep. For you. For me.  For us.

So that is exactly what I am going to do each night guys! At this moment in time, I cannot promise a specific time that each night’s devotional will be officially “published” at, but what I can promise, is that at some time before midnight, one will be posted! Because I can assure you, I sometimes need these words, just as much as you.

So, rather than waiting for it to (by chance) pop up on your social media feed, make sure to enter your e-mail address and follow/subscribe. That way, it will be sent directly to your e-mail Inbox for your reading pleasure! What is better than that; Easy peazy 👏🏼 (This feature can be found on your MOBILE device, by navigating to the “MEET ALYSSA” page, and scrolling to the bottom. Or, on your DESKTOP, in the right column of the page. Just make sure to confirm your subscription by pressing “accept” in the return e-mail that you receive (following subscribing)!

Have a wonderful rest of your day loves!

XO, ACD ♡🦋

References

Devotional. (2019). In Merriam-Webster. Retrieved April 24, 2019, from https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/devotional

Monday’s + Re-routing Negative Thoughts

I’ve been up since 4:30 a.m. with little Miss Brooklyn Meadow.  She is finding comfort in absolutely nothing.  Milk?  Nope.  Me holding and rocking her for the past two hours?  Yeah, I love this mama, but no.  Clean, new diaper? Yeah, again, thanks mama, but just no.  Annnnnnnnnnnd as a last resort, I switch on Netflix and begin streaming her favorite television show.  C’mon B, it’s True!  Still. Not. Happy.  Hm.

Now onto me:  My dang right eye.  “When one door closes, another opens…”  I’m not feelin’ as optimistic at the moment.  This surely is a bad joke.  One chalazion heals, another stye forms?  HA!  Yep, surely, we have ourselves a lovely stye that has decided to plant its roots and set up camp in my bottom outer eyelid.  AWESOME.  My thoughts begin to race, criss-crossing, and playing  bumper cars on the tracks of my brain waves.  Why, why, why do I keep getting these?  Must. Research. Now.  Phoning Dr. Google (and down the rabbit hole I shall go).

This was the internal dialogue that had began to ramp up in my head this morning.  It literally start to finish lasted a matter of seconds before I smacked myself in the face with my Sunday evening prayer/mantra that I had so craftily devised and penned last night: “Looking forward to all that God has planned for me this week.  May I have the strength + courage to overcome any/all hardships + may my heart be open to all (even the smallest, and sometimes hardest to see) blessings 🙌🏼Amen.”  (For similar content, click here.)

But, how?  How, when we are completely trapped in our own carefully and haphazardly spun web of negativity, do we blanket our thoughts with positivity?  It feels at times for me anyhow, dang impossible.  I find myself asking God, why?  What did I do to deserve this?  Why am I always dealing with an issue?  And, once I get to this point, and we all reach a similar “point,” I laugh at myself.  I metaphorically, pick myself up, and in the words of Rachel Hollis, I hear, “Girl, (you need to) wash your face.”

So, my daughter woke me up in the middle of the night?  She needed me.  Thank you Lord for giving me the good health and strength to be there for her.  Thank you Lord for granting me those extra seconds, minutes, hours to spend with her (even if they were in the wee hours of the night).  How blessed I am to be able to spend such precious time with her.  Thank you Lord for giving her good health, so that she is able to signal for me to be by her side in her times of need.  My eye?  Get over it Alyssa.  It’s a dang stye.  Be thankful that you are able to see, that you have your vision, and that it isn’t even the slightest bit near life threatening.  Be thankful that it can be treated at home with simple home remedies.

Look at all of those blessings.  It is all of those blessings, that I am unable to focus on when I am blinded by negativity.

This y’all, is where your mindset must shift.  It quite literally is as simple as turning the switch.  It is looking for those blessing in any/all things.  Blessings can be found everywhere.  Even, through and throughout our hardships.  Our days are quite literally FILLED entirely with blessings.  It is just a matter of you seeking those blessing, cherishing them, thanking and making praise to the Lord, our Savior.  Or, any higher power/being that you believe in for that matter.  (I just wanted to take a moment to say that for this and any future postings, although I am making reference to God through my Christian faith, I want y’all when you come across these references, to please, please, please replace my beliefs with yours, so that y’all can get the most out of my writing! ♡ Sorry for the run on!)

Let’s make searching for each days blessings a game.  I can promise you, that when you begin to fill your brain space with positivity, and you quite literally begin to count your blessings, your brain is going to be so dang full, that there will be no room for negativity, for any anxious-ridden thoughts.  Ultimately, for any thoughts that do not serve you.  Y’all can tell those pesky thoughts to go-home!

In closing y’all, we are human.  We are going to experience negative thoughts DAILY.  Though you, like me, we have the choice to either sink or swim.  We can either drown ourselves in negativity, or swim (somewhere on a beach, with our fruity, umbrella-laden cocktail in our hand).

It is completely our (your) choice.

I say, let’s swim together.  It is a heck lot more fun!

XO, ACD♡🦋

*Side note – I dedicate this post to my beautiful mother who not only loves me endlessly, but who taught me how to be… how to “wash my face” before it was even a thang’, who taught me how to swim.  For that I am endlessly and forever grateful, I love you mama.

Faith/Fear

This is a story of faith over fear, of sticking to your wits, of not giving up, and of forging ahead into the unknown (knowing fully well that an abundance of unknown blessings + opportunities lie ahead).  It is about wholeheartedly understanding the collective value of stepping stones, and realizing the singular value of each and every one.

The months leading up to having my daughter had left me mildly anxiety-ridden.  Why?  Because I had harbored a great amount of fear of the unknown.

From the start, I had decided that I was going to stay at home and raise our daughter, and nothing was going to change my mind, nor stop me. (My hubby, who played a large role in the decision-process, was totally on board.) However, tied to this decision arose a surplus of fear and nervousness. Upon reflection, I now realize that a good portion of my fear and negative energy stemmed from what exactly this new adjustment period was going to entail.  I worried that “stay-at-home mom-life” was going to be “too easy,” disorganized, and in a sense, unfulfilling.  How was cleaning, changing diapers, and folding laundry all day going to make me feel fulfilled?  I deceptively believed that my own sense of self-fulfillment was created through alarm clocks, firm appointments, and the rushes of adrenaline associated with drowning in work. Feeling “fulfilled” with every breath of fresh air taken at the surface, that each completed task had allowed for me to take.  Boy, was I wrong.  Rather than leading with faith, I had fallen into the trap of fear.  God, yet again, had proven me wrong.

As the weeks dwindled and the countdown began, my husband and family/friends had endlessly tried to convince me to slow down with work.  As my due date began to aggressively approach, they had feared that my hour plus commute each day was too risky.  They, too, had worried that me being home by myself during the week (as my husband traveled each week for work) was not highly desirable nor favorable.  Though, in true “me” fashion, I had my own ideas, and was too headstrong to listen to their opinions or concerns.  I was determined to not give up, to not quit.

So, I had carried on with my daily power-hour walks, and had worked until the day I delivered.  I carried out the “control” that I was so misguided into believing that I carried over my life.

Through motherhood, I have learned that I do not control things.  He does.  I instead, take the position of dreamer, setting endless goals, and taking on only what He has given me the power to control through his strength.  The instant that I had shifted my mindset, something extraordinary happened.  Blessings (some of which I had never before realized) began falling into my lap.  In addition to the greatest blessing of all, being given the health + ability to stay-at-home and raise our daughter, I was also able to complete college courses that I had so badly wanted to check off my list.  I was able to spend more time with my family (that I never realized I would be so badly missing when the time came for us to re-locate).  And, amongst the other countless blessings, I was able to write, inspire (be inspired) + create.  Things I would not have been able to do if I went back to my ‘9-5’ job.

Granted that the future and change is weighted with fear, it is critical that we alter our mindset and switch our lens to a more optimistic, positive, and maybe not-so “realist” perspective.  Because, an optimist will never feel totally defeated at the face of failure.  Secondly, it is essential that we cling to faith, resting our fear, troubles, and worries on His shoulders.  For with God nothing shall be impossible (Luke 1:37).

Much love y’all!

XO, 🦋